That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I think your dad took our porno
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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