I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
