I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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