plz talk dirty to me
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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