Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
