I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Randomize
