you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
