I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
