a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
