Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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