oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
