just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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