so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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