Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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