Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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