Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
