evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
