You're completely useless in the revolution.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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