Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
