if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
