i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize