i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I skipped work to stalk him.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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