It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
