I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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