um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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