i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
