he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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