hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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