Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
