My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
