That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
