And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
