Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
