Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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