hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize