I am spending my child support on dildos
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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