yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Randomize
