You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
