do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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