Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
