Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize