I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize
