How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Come back. Shots need mouths.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
