My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
