Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I have demons in me.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize