What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
