I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
