you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
