Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
