I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
