Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
