I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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